love sandwich

The perfect date

Actually I had three this weekend.  I was quite busy, and loving every minute of it!

Friday night Fletch and I went to see The Avengers.  He has been waiting a few months to see it.  Popcorn and candy for the boy.  I spent a good quarter of the movie watching him watch the movie.  I still can't believe how big he is getting, my little boy is no longer little.  It's shocking and sad and sweet and amazing all at once.

 

(showing off his ring, the one he bought with his own money.  the one that matches his dad's)

Saturday night Jim and I went out on a whim.  He called and asked if I would like to go get a tattoo with him, something to commemorate 13 years of marriage.  I was in right away.  I thought maybe something small with the date.  He was too.  An apple with 9-10-99 underneith.  Yes, that's right, an apple, not a heart.  We've each got one of those, I have a heart with his name in a banner on my low back.  He's got a heart with my name in a banner between his shoulder blades.  The apple is silly and significant all at once.  

On our first date I picked the movie, in the early days he always let me pick the movie.  I usually picked the worst, not on purpose mind you.  Just bad taste I guess.  So, the movie we saw that night was In Dreams, a terrible movie with Annete Bening and Robert Downey Jr.  Him a serial killer, her the would-be victim connected to his mind.  Much of it is set in the apple orchard.

Creepy?  Maybe.  Silly?  For sure.  Here's the think though:  I got it right away when Jim suggested the apple.  That is just how we are.  We get eachother.  That apple represents way more than our love, our years together, way more than our sense of humor or our first date.   That apple represents what it is about us that works so well, why we have made it through all these years, all the crap the MS has brought to our lives, all the overwhelming stress.

That apple, it represents how we are so much the same and so very different all at once.  How we laugh at the same things, want the same things, how we so easily live the same life.  It also represents how we accept eachother, our differences, our separateness.  How I can't stand most of the punk rock he listens to, but the light in his eyes when he is listening to it or talking about it, that light brings me joy.  How he can walk into a room I have utterly destroyed with paints or scraps of fabric and walk right back out whistling cause he has learned to love and appreciate my need to create.

That apple?  It really is perfect, just right.

 

Then, today, I had a date with Maggy.  Just the two of us, we went to the Children's Museum.  She had many questions on the car ride there.  Wanting to know how long we would stay, what she could do, where she could paly.  I told her is was her day, I would just follow her.  And I did.  She had a blast.  She loves the grocery store and pizza parlor.  My favorite part was watching her on the stage, dancing and singing.  She is a performer, at heart and in her soul.  Man I love that little girl.

 

Tonight I feel so grateful, so satiated.  It was the a great weekend, perfect in every way.

Hello old friend

I was just purusing posts I started earlier this year and never finished.  I was trying to find one I could wrap up and  send out to the world.  Life changes so fast though, so much does not apply today!  I am feeling some sadness about what I have neglected to write about here, birthdays, trips, moments of joy, you know: life. 

When I was pregnant with Fletcher I received a small notebook from my sister-in-law, Briana.  I wrote regularly (well semi) about life with the boy up until Maggy was born.  I started a note book for her.  Life got busy though, so busy it was hard to keep up.  I felt guilt though, guilt that I was not leaving a story for Maggy.  Each time I pulled her book out I felt I had to write in his too.  It became something I avoided because I put pressure on myself.  SO, the blog filled that space.  I could write a story for them both.  Here I am though, once again finding life - the living part preventing me from sitting down and documenting it. 

I have so much I want to share, so much I want to be able to read about later to remember.  The time will come, I will carve out a bit of precious time because it is important to me.  Just for this small moment, though, I will share a picture or two, three, four of our love:

Mother's Day 2012

Scissors are for cutting....

 Last year Maggy wanted "bumps".  She was referring to bangs, just like Junah has.  So, she got them.  Recently she decided she doesn't want bumps anymore.  She wants them long in her ponytail.  She wants to be a princess.  She wants hair like Tangled, that's Repunzel in case you don't know.

Last week I decided to have an innocent chat with my little girl.  She's been using scissors on her own of late, all alone in her room.  Quietly cutting away, singing and spinning some amazing yarn in her own head.  I thought it would be a good idea to give her some information.  I told her, "Maggy, sometimes kids decide to cut their own hair.  If you decide to cut your hair, I just want you to know that I can't fix it.  We can't put it back on.  Ok?"  It was so easy.  She said, "Ok".  That was it, no problem.  I felt confident.  She totally got it.

Silly me.  I imagine your laughing, you know where this is going. 

I got a text with a few pictures from Jim while I was at work this afternoon.  "....it's not fixable...It looks kinda European...She started crying, she said you told her she could cut her hair."

I just laughed, I couldn't help it.  She did it, and she did not hold back!

 

 Pretty Punk Rock if you ask me.

 

 

 

I home when called when I had a break.  She asked, "Mom, why did you tell me I could cut my hair?!!!!!".  We spoke a bit, I asked if she would let us cut her hair short, buzz it.  "Like bald?  No!!!  I don't want to be bald!!!".

She's not bald, but she let Jim shave her head.  She loves it, Jim said she jumped up and down, dancing, singing about not washing her hair anymore.  We love it too.  We won't miss the tangles. 

 

 

 Fletcher cut he own bangs too:  Awesome, my kids are awesome.  I think he looks like a rock star, think Whitesnake, David Coverdale, Here I Go Again.

 

 Oh, and if you think you've seen this kid before, you're not imagining it, check this out:

Fletcher's first buzz cut 2006.

From Fletcher to You...

Last Thursday Fletch ran out of the classroom to start his weekend.  He rushed at Jim waving a piece of paper, "Can we go home and watch this Dad?!!!!"

We did.  All weekend long we watched this, shared it listened to it, and danced to it.  We love this.  I love this.  Watching the video brings tears to my eyes.  No, I'm not a big soccar fan.  I could take it or leave it.  However, the joy and sheer abandon of the play, it gets to me, speaks to me.  I love joyfullness, appreciation for life and movement and PLAY.  It just feels so good.

 

 

{this moment}

{this moment} - A  ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

Inspired by Soulemama and all those inspired by her.....

{this moment}

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

Inspired by Soulemama and all those inspired by her.....

The atmosphere of home

The atmoshphere in our home is alway fluctuating.  I keep telling myself if we had just a bit more room it could be maintained a bit more steadily, that we could manage to control it better and savor it more. 

The house is small though, too small to really feel we have the space to stay out of eachother's way. To stay out of eachothers way and yet stay connected by the harmony we are all experiencing as we are enjoying our various chosen past times.

Too small to be doing activities, different activities all at once.  Too small for the peace and work space I crave, the neatness and ease Jim craves, the attention Maggy craves and the constant entertainment provided by a screen that Fletcher craves.

We have been bombarded by bickering, yelling, tears, angry parents, angry kids and general unrest.  I am not saying it is all because of the cable.  No, but I am saying that it contributes because it disconnects us and keeps us that way.  It allows us to easily go long stretches of time without sharing ideas, thoughts, needs or excitiment.  Or even just say hi and share a smile, a moment.

And so it has come to this, the cable is gone again.  It is amazing how little we miss it once it is gone, but how greatly we all rely upon it when it is available.

Jim and I have had an on and off again relationship with the cable company, one that had nothing to do with his having worked for them.  We've gone without for long periods then been seduced back more than once.  Somehow though, we seem to always come back to this spot, this place where cable is just too intrusive for our comfort.

I am not sure why it works for us, we still have the computer and all that is available there.  We still have Netflix and all that is offered there.  We rent movies from redbox at least twice per week and check more than a handful out at a time from the library. 

Our house is still full of screen time.  Video games are always an option and Fletch avails himeself of their entertainment often.  Did I mention the computer?  There are two and are frequently in use at the same time.  The kids use the laptop to stream Netflix or any of the number of websites that run programs free.  They also use it for dvds and computer games.

So what you may be asking is: "What good does it do us to cancel the cable?".  The only thing Jim and I can come up with is all the advertising.  It changes the whole mood and tone of what is in the air.  It also seems to keep the kids entranced more and for longer periods of time.

I guess too, the variety is more readily available and your somewhat more likely to happen on something you don't necessarily want to watch, but will because it is just there.  That certainly happens to me frequently.

And so no more cartoon network, and although the kids grumbled, they really don't seem to be missing it all that much.  You could not tell by what Fletcher says, but by how he acts - or rather doesn't act.  Peace seems to be returning to our home, one less commercial at a time.

And no more Bravo or Food Network for us.  Yes, we miss our shows: Food Network Star, Chopped, and for me the housewives of New Jersey and New York City, embarrassingly also Teen Mom.  All these reality shows we get sucked into, can't seem to live without, but find we barely miss at all once they are gone from the space they once occupied in our lives. That is big.  I am the type to let myself get sucked in and watch episode after episode after episode till my brain is literally mush.

So, cancelling cable really does meet a need in our home.  So does keeping Netflix and rentals and Hulu.  And the video games.

And speaking of Netflix, I just found season one of Midsomer Murders, that should keep me entertained for some time!

 

{this moment}

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

Inspired by Soulemama and all those inspired by her.....

{this moment}

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

Inspired by Soulemama and all those inspired by her.....